Ronin

I just realized how sorry a state this blog has been in recently, not being updated for 3 months plus. I also realized how much my English has deteriorated, to the point that I can’t even construct simple sentences without being lame. As such, please pardon any grammatical errors and/or fragments you might notice along the way.

Also, a not so gentle disclaimer: This post (as you might have guessed via the suggestive title) contains excessive amounts of emo©, reader discretion is highly advised. If you find such content offensive, please hit the “home” key on your browser or navigate away. You have been warned.

Before you ask, yes I am aware that the last 5 posts of so have been highly emo, and they were months apart to boot. I’ve just been too lazy to blog about the other stuff that’s happened in the last three months (DaiCon, GACC, Merdeka Yamcha almost immediately come to mind), and now that they’ve long passed, I don’t see the need for me to blog about them neither.

So what inspired me to write this post? Let’s just say that assignments might be a pain in the rear, but they do help you in certain ways, like keeping you occupied till 8 in the morning. They also provide plenty of food for thought, and tonnes of excitement if you can get stimulated by circuits and get turned on by numbers like I do.

Anyway, that aside, I have come to a simple realization that managed to elude me for the past 19 years of my life. The answer has been so obvious that it’s a miracle that I failed to notice it till today, even though it’s been staring at me all this while like the way a bunch of old geezers stare at strippers doing a cocktease at your local sleazy bar.

I just realized…

… I don’t have a best friend.

Yes, go ahead and laugh. If I were reading some random person’s rant and discovered that the issue in question was actually just him being emo over not having a best friend, I would laugh cock and call him an idiot for wasting 5 minutes of my life. That is, until the reality of my pathetic situation hits me – that I’m no better off myself.

Back in primary, I had these 6 friends that I still keep in touch occasionally even till now. During secondary school, I met these 6 wacky, fucked-up SOBs who totally spiced up my secondary schooling and made it one of the best moments of my entire life. When I entered MMU and subsequently, PE12, I got to know these awesome guys that made my Alpha year the most cherished year in my Uni life. In fact, I even wrote a (short-lived) fiction about them, though it eventually died down because of my laziness.

Looking back, though, there was never really someone I could call my best friend. Nobody I could really talk to, nobody I could really connect with, nobody I could really count on. It’s pathetic how it took me 19 years to realize that I’ve been actually quite lonely throughout my life.

Now before you ask, yes I could always talk to Amber but there are times where I’d prefer talking to another guy instead. And yes, this does not happen very often, so I’d like to thank you in advance for not suspecting my sexual orientation.

So what does this long emo rant have anything to do with my assignments, or the topic of this post for that matter? I’ll leave it to you to connect the dots – it shouldn’t be too hard.

You know those people who openly declare that they have a best friend, despite getting teased for it?

… I envy those people.

君がくれた勇気は 億千万 億千万

過ぎ去りし季節は ドラマティック